


Requiem for a Bard

by stargayzing



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Gen, Light Angst, Post-Canon, This is basically one big Spoiler for Episode 59, but also Fluff and a Happy End! yay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-02
Updated: 2017-04-02
Packaged: 2018-10-11 04:38:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,523
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10455150
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stargayzing/pseuds/stargayzing
Summary: Magnus has a promise to uphold (and yes, he is going to go completely overboard with it).





	

**Author's Note:**

> I just had to write this after listening to the most recent episode - still, I hope this gets jossed.  
> (And if not, fingers crossed that things go a little like this.)

Magnus, despite what his appearance, general background and heroic demeanour might suggest, is actually very good at complaining.  
  
He abuses this power loudly and frequently. One time he even got Merle to heal his skinned knee. And it only took ten minutes of constant whining! He's practically an expert. Which, for the record? Makes it entirely unreasonable that an Agent of Death won't do him a favor that might, just a little, break the laws of nature.   
  
Kravitz remains unmoved by the all complaining, wheedling, passionate speech-ing and beseeching Magnus does. Not even Magnus' best attempt at puppy dog eyes do the trick.   
  
"This is stupid, " Magnus complains after a three hour session goes nowhere (see?).   
  
"You're telling me." The dryness of his voice suggests Kravitz does not, in fact, appreciate being dragged to the material plane just so Magnus can irritate him.   
  
Magnus blithely ignores the glare and says: "You know, I'm pretty sure I saved your life more than once. Unlife. Afterlife? Whatever. You owe me one, right?" He gives Kravitz a charming smile and puts one arm on his shoulder. In a friendly not-at-all threatening manner. (Not his fault the height difference makes his biceps bulge, by the way.)   
  
"We saved each other's lives plenty, I reckon," Kravitz replies, entirely unimpressed and now with one eyebrow raised. "Besides, you can't go around calling yourself a hero and then use your goodie twoshoeing for leverage. It's not polite."   
  
Magnus switches tracks instantly. "Screw polite," he says with feeling (a second eyebrow joins the first), "I'm trying to honor a friend's dying wish. Can't you respect that?"   
  
"I can," Kravitz allows. Then his eyes flicker red for a moment and he continues: "Listen, Maggie, talking to you's been a riot as always, but I'm just tryna do my job here, see? I can't just let a Soul out of the Astral Plane so it can go on a holiday."   
  
"I thought you might say that." Shooting Kravitz a pitying look, Magnus pulls out a stone of farspeech.   
  
The second there's a crack and a familiar voice sounds out, Kravitz shrugs off his hand and fumbles for the stone.   
  
He holds it to his ear and steps a few feet away, so Magnus can't actually hear what Taako says. He has a pretty good idea, though. And whatever it was, it works like a charm (ha): Just a minute later Kravitz, looking defeated and a little flustered, hangs up and turns to Magnus.   
  
He hands him the stone and clears his throat. He clears it again before saying: "Well. That was embarrassing for the both of us."   
  
"Mostly for you, but yes," Magnus agrees magnanimously. "Of course, I can promise to never mention it if you'll-?"   
  
"Fine!" Kravitz says, burying his face in his hands, "you can take him." His voice is a little muffled, but Magnus can still hear him when he quietly adds: "Just... Just don't tell the Queen, yeah?"   
  
"Great! I'll pick him up next Tuesday," Magnus says brightly, shoving the Reaper through the open rift before he can protest.   
  
¤   
  
Tuesday comes with some rushed preparations and a lot of excitement. Magnus is basically vibrating by the time a rift opens in his friend's backyard and Kravitz steps through, looking both very determined and faintly resigned. (And, really. Almost ten years after that second date and he's still as whipped as he was then).   
  
"Lenny!" Magnus calls out, and Kravitz levels him with a death glare. Magnus' attention, however, is focused on the floating spirit light cautiously trailing after the Reaper.   
  
"Johann," he says, unable to stop a wide grin spreading across his face, "you made it!"   
  
"Uh," the light replies, "I don't really know what's going on, but it's, uh, good to see you, Magnus."   
  
"Yeah!" Magnus says, ignoring he can't actually, well.   
  
Kravitz sighs before reaching out and gently touching Johann's soul. The light shivers a little, contracting before quickly expanding and changing hue and shape. After a moment, Johann is standing there, in his little Bard get up and only vaguely translucent.   
  
"Thank you," Magnus says, solemn for once.   
  
Kravitz grins, then, and says: "In for a penny and all that. Now be careful, right? And you," he says, pointing a stern finger at Johan, "I'll be seeing here sunrise at the very latest."   
  
He opens up a rift. As he steps through it, he calls over his shoulder, "I wouldn't recommend any physical contact" and is gone.   
  
Magnus freezes, already in the process of hugging the death out of the ghostly bard. Johann's shape flickers out of existence for just a second and he quickly lets go.   
  
"So no hugging," Magnus concludes sadly.   
  
Johann blinks, sees the expression on his face and chuckles. "No hugging," he agrees, "but, uh, I have to ask: Why did you break _me_ out of the afterlife?"   
  
"Well, I'd say it's more like borrowing..." Magnus gestures ahead. "Walk with me? There's something I wanted to show you."   
  
"Uh, show me?" Johann says, then looks down at himself to see if he's even capable of walking. He's not actually standing on the ground but floating works, he guesses.   
  
"It's not far," Magnus reassures, leading him around the back of a house and onto a broad footpath. They make their way into a small village, Johann occasionally floating through other travelers when they don't move out of the way, clearly unable to see him. They're approaching the largest building in the town by far when Magnus - who to that point had been contently watching Johann float up to the villagers, cautiously waving hands in front of their faces at first and then pulling goofy faces with with increasing enthusiasm - finally answers the question. "I. Well. I managed to convince Kravitz to let you come back for a day - all by myself, of course, because that's the kind of... Well. You're here because I wanted you to know that... we didn't forget you."   
  
Johann stops in his tracks. "Magnus?" He says, and he sounds shaky, now. His form flickers once, too, and takes on a distinctly blueish hue. "What are you...?"   
  
"Let me show you," Magnus preempts. "Please."   
  
Pulse racing - how does that even _work_ \- he follows Magnus. He's wide-eyed and uncertain and when he steps into the school's courtyard and sees the statue, he freezes.   
  
It's-   
  
It's.   
  
Johann's not _that_ kind of artist, but he can appreciate the craftsmanship. The statue's huge, a dozen people easily, and made of or at least gilded with gold, and the detail is so expertly rendered he has no trouble recognizing who it depicts. There's a familiar tiefling with glasses, Kiera, one of the seekers, he remembers, and that poor intern Jasper - each of his scales lovingly rendered - and some people he recognises from the common rooms, Dev and Maggie, bards like him if both very unique, and even one of Avi's friends, the engineer, Rose or something. And-   
  
And there he is. Johann the Bard, front and center, holding his violin as if he is mid-stroke and with a tiny smile on his face. _His hat even has a tiny golden feather in it_.   
  
Suddenly he's glad he's incorporeal. That way, he doesn't feel it when his legs give out from under him and he sinks to the floor.   
  
"Johann?" Magnus says, crowding above him and sounding worried. He reaches out but hesitates, hand hovering above Johan's translucent shoulder.   
  
"What-" He starts to choke out, when his eyes focus on the plaque in front of his eyes. It's square, with small, crowded rows upon rows of names.  And he finds he recognizes them all. Kayla from the kitchens, Roe Rosen - that was her name! - from engineering, Kiera Serecho - the only seeker unfortunate enough to have landed on this list - and Ace and the gentle Katey from the Daycare and-   
  
"Johann?" Magnus repeats like a dull echo as the bard finds his own name on the list.   
  
Some of the sadness fades, however, when he focuses on it properly. "Johann von Johann?" he chokes out, torn between laughter and tears.   
  
"Yeah, well, we didn't know your last name so we... improvised? You deserved to be on the list, anyway."   
  
As he gets to his feet, Johann stares into the golden face of his counterpart. "They, uh, they made me taller than I was," he says, slowly. Magnus laughs, a little.   
  
Johann lets his normally downturned lips quirk into a quick smile. Then he has to ask: "Magnus... What is this? The, uh, monument, this list?"   
  
His friend is solemn as he replies. "It's a memorial for all the people who died when the Hunger first came here. We managed to drive it back and lost many more on the way but... those first few, right in the Bureau's Headquarters, they hit close to home."   
  
"I see," Johann says. He doesn't know if he does, even. Doesn't know if it matters that he was one of the first but far from the last. He stares down at that little plaque and remembers how Katey used to ask him to play his lute for the kids and how relieved Rowan, the helpful if miserable clerk from Fantasy Costco's, had always been to see a regular customer that wasn't about to send Garfield into incensed glee followed by the feeling of betrayal and then regret. (How a man survives working with Garfield for years but a few overworldly shadowpeople manage to off him, Johann will never understand).   
  
"The Voidfish isn't on this," he speaks up suddenly. "Is it...?"   
  
"That's.... a long story." Magnus grimaces. "I promise to tell you when it's my turn to visit, how about it?"   
  
Johann raises his eyebrows doubtfully. "You're, uh, looking a little under the weather," he comments, "but I remember you saying you weren't planning on dying. Like, ever."   
  
Magnus grins. "Like the gray?" He says, pointing to his hair. "The scars make me look badass, right? The wrinkles, not so much."   
  
When Johann just hums, non-commital, Magnus drops the act and says: "Well. I'm... kind of looking forward to it, if I'm being honest. But for once, I'm not rushing."   
  
He looks up at the sky, blue and clear and so far away from the gray of that horrifying immobile storm. Then he shakes his head and looks back at Johann. "I can tell you have questions."   
  
"Uh, some," Johann allows. "Mostly... well, not why. Because we're friends, right? Maybe even family, in a way. But how and who and... and why Johann _von Johann?"_   
  
With a shrug that comes off a little defensive, Magnus says: "Like I said, we didn't know your last name. And we couldn't get a hold of your employee records because we didn't even have those - do you ever think about how messed up that was? - and... Well, the Director wasn't in on the whole memorial thing when we commissioned it."   
  
Johann frowns a little. "Right. Of course the Director wouldn't want that. So how-?"   
  
"I think you're underestimating Lucretia," Magnus interrupts. "Or how tenacious the three of us could be."   
  
"Where, uh, where _are_ Taako and Merle? They're not-?"   
  
"Taako's being Taako. He's fine and grossly in love. You're lucky you're dead and don't have to hear him talk dirty over a stone of farspeech and- Moving on."   
  
"And Merle?"   
  
"Merle is busy seeing to his grandchildren," Magnus explains. "All thirty of them." He sits down on a nearby park bench, eyes still on the golden statue that is now blinding in the midday sun. "I don't think you actually ever meet them, but he has two kids. A quiet, bookish daughter and a... the only word that comes to mind is rambunctious... boy. So of course, surprising literally everyone, it's the daughter that runs off with a tiefling lady she just met. It turned out alright in the end; Merle even gave them his blessing. About two years ago, they opened up an orphanage. Merle's been pretty involved. I think Mavis said something about alliteration and how he should go from a deadbeat dad to a generous grandpa. He seems to have his hands full there, but we try and meet up sometimes."   
  
Johann stares straight ahead. He doesn't even blink when a falling leaf goes right through him. "The thought of Merle with small children," he says, at length, "is honestly terrifying."   
  
"Hey, he's trying," Magnus says. He picks up the leaf from where it's on the park bench and politely puts it on the ground. Johann cracks a smile at Magnus' hand going through his lap, then grows a little more serious.   
  
"You, uh…. you mentioned the Director. Did she make it? Did Avi? Killian and Carey?"   
  
"They're alive," Magnus says.   
  
Johann nods his head a little, accepting that. Then something occurs to him. "Oh man. The Director must be _so_ pissed we gave up on the whole secrecy and Rites of Remembrance."  
  
"Ehh. There was some yelling, but she came around eventually." Magnus nods his head at the statue - no, the building behind it - and continues: "She even helped us name the school. The Johann Lehmann Institute for Composition, Ukulele and Poetry."   
  
Johann turns his head to stare at Magnus so fast there's a barely audible snap. "The... What did you say?"   
  
"The Johann Lehmann Institute," Magnus repeats. "Although it usually just goes by the acronym. It's a training place for bards, mostly, sort of a university as well. It's been around for maybe thirty years, but seeing as you helped save the World and all, they let us rename it."   
  
"This… Magnus, how did you do all this?"   
  
He waves his awe away. "I had help. And, once again, the day was saved by a competent woman. Come."   
  
Magnus leads Johann, who looks absolutely shell shocked, into one of the buildings and up a set of stairs. By the time they're halfway up, the faint sound of violins have reach the edges of his hearing. It gets louder as they continue on, but Magnus only shushes him when he finally asks where they're going.   
  
It's only when they open a small side door into a large auditorium that the pieces click together. A handful of young students are gathered at the center of the room, each holding different string instruments and playing something he recognizes.   
  
"That," he says, swallows, tries again, "That's my song. Opus 43, _Pro Caena_."  
  
"It is," Magnus agrees, then winces. "Or, well, it's an attempt. They can only get better at it, really."   
  
"I don't get it," Johan says dully. "It's- The songs.... the Voidfish ate all my compositions. They're all gone."   
  
"Clearly not," Magnus says, because he's kind of an asshole.   
  
Johann keeps staring, mesmerised, at the practicing orchestra. "They're butchering it," he says, voice filled with incredible joy.   
  
Magnus laughs out loud, startling one of the students into making a chainsaw motion. Once the awful shriek is over, Magnus says fondly: "Well, in their defense? You were one hell of a musician."   
  
Johann sits down. He tears his eyes away from the group - who have moved onto a new piece, another one of his - long enough to say to Magnus, "Uh, you still haven't told me how you managed this."   
  
Magnus sits down, shrugs a little. "Like I said, we were saved by a competent woman. Do you remember Zoe?"   
  
"Uh..."   
  
"Leon's assistant? The dragonborn lady," Magnus clarifies. "Kind of ditzy but good sense of humor, always carried chocolate for when we emotionally devastated Leon?"   
  
“Uh, you mean Stripes?" Johann says, realisation dawning. "She was always nice."   
  
"Turns out, she also has a photographic memory. It’s apparently useful for when you’re an artificer’s assistant. But, unfortunately, no musical talent whatsoever."   
  
"I don’t get it," Johann interjects, dully.   
  
"We worked together to reconstruct some of your songs," Magnus says, "I'm pretty good with a fiddle and Zoe - Stripes, huh? - managed to hum most of the songs for the professors here. It took some time, but they're masterpieces; they deserve to be out in the world. _You_ deserve that.”

“I don’t know what to say,” Johann says, because he doesn't. What _do_ you say when the weight on your chest you’ve been carrying for years, that only got heavier when he died and realised there was no chance, now, anyone would ever know who he was...  _What he meant…_

It wasn't supposed to be like that, he often thought, that the one thing that should have made him memorable - his talent and music - was the reason he’d be forgotten. Creations and own existence all consumed and doomed to be forgotten. This is so beyond everything he’d hoped for, it’s pretty much impossible-

“Wait,” Johann blurts out. “This shouldn't be possible. The Voidfish… Uh, the students shouldn't hear anything but static, much less be able to play my songs.”

Magnus sighs. He looks a little sad, now, and there’s a sinking feeling in Johann’s gut.

“Is it… is the Voidfish dead?”

“It’s… not,” Magnus says, clearly thinking over how to explain this. “Did you ever wonder where the Voidfish came from?” he says, apropos to nothing.

“Um. Space?” Johann tries.

“Close enough,” Magnus says, smiling like there’s a joke there that Johann is missing. “Point is, Voidy didn't come from Faerun. Didn't even come from this plane of existence, actually. So when it was reunited with its baby, it wanted to go home.”

Baby?” Johann says, utterly lost.

“Another long story,” Magnus says apologetically. “The point is, the Voidfish is back where it came from, and as a side effect… the static doesn't work anymore. Everyone remembers everything.”

“That, uh,” Johann says, even as hope unfurls and stretches its wings inside his chest, “that must have been a pretty big headache.”

“Yo-yo…” Magnus says, putting an arm around the back of the chair Johann’s sitting in (but careful not to touch), “you have no idea. Luckily, we had Lucretia to deal with everything. Me, Taako and Merle went to Fantasy Hawaii for a couple of weeks, just until the whole thing blew over.”

“The Director must have been /so/ mad,” Johann says, quietly chuckling as he pictures it.

“She’s actually who sent us there,” Magnus adds, “said something about the situation being volatile and the three of us being about as useful as a duck with a stick of dynamite. Which, in hindsight? Was pretty rude.”

“Uh, yeah,” Johann agrees, but Magnus talks over him entirely: “We’d be something as cool as a swan _at the very least_.”

“Um. I feel like we’ve gotten a little off topic.”

“Right.”

Magnus blinks, looks around at the room. The group of students is packing their instruments away, occasionally shooting furtive glances at the guy sitting at the top of the auditorium and talking to himself, which means it’s probably about time for lunch. His stomach growls at the thought and he pats it absently. “Let’s get something to eat,” he decides, “then it’s about time to meet up with some scribes that are dying to meet you.”

He eyes Johann’s spectral shape and adds: “No offense.”

“None, uh, taken. But I don't think they’ll be able to see me,” Johann dutifully points out.

“That’s the fun part,” Magnus says, getting to his feet and stretching until his back pops. There’s a fiddle strapped to his back, Johann suddenly notices. Magnus winks rakishly and jokes: “Think you can instruct an amateur like me how to play one of your works?”

“I’m, uh, I can try. But what are we even doing.” Johann gets up and Magnus immediately strides towards the door. He has to hurry to catch up, which is a little disorienting with the whole ghostly-floating thing, but when he looks up, Magnus meets his eyes with a broad grin. “Come up with any new compositions over in ye olde Astral Plane?”

The darkness that’s been choking him for so long lifts with a suddenness that leaves him dizzy. It can’t be that easy, he thinks, but there’s already a smile spreading on his face. “A few,” he replies, “there’s one - Concierto for the Voidfish… I swear it’s not as sad as it sounds,” he adds when he sees the look on Magnus’ face.

“Can’t wait to hear it,” Magnus says, smiling softly now. “Can’t wait to see _them_ hear it. You are about to make these nerds’ goddamn day.”

“There’s… a few more songs. About, uh, a hundred?”

Magnus halts for a second. Blinks, opens his mouth to say something, closes it again. Then he shrugs and continues: “Well. I guess we’re all skipping lunch. Come on, Johann, you heard what the Reaperman said. We have until sunrise.”

“I think he said sunset, actually…” Johann replies doubtfully, but Magnus waves his concerns away. Johann chuckles, a little, as he follows Magnus through the hallways of a school named in his honour, and he’s still smiling by the time they arrive at the office of a hoard of musicians and scribes who are pretty much about to cream their pants in excitement at the thought of getting their hands on more Johann originals.

This... is a pretty good ending, he thinks.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to all of you wonderful people who volunteered as BoB employees and immediately got killed off ♡ (Special thanks to Kiera for Johann's real last name!)  
> The latin "pro caena" means (or should, at least, but I'm a little rusty) "for dinner."


End file.
